2004-10-06 - 3:07 p.m.

Fucking Travesty

One of the manager's I used to work for many eons ago when I worked in the "Adult Entertainment Industry" made a habit of calling anything insignificant that didn't work right "A Fucking Travesty".

Everytime he said it,I laughed.

He had obviously perfected the right tone of laughing voice & dripping sarcasm to make this saying GO OFF each and everytime.

The other day I ran into one of those Fucking Travesties and I can tell you, honestly, it is truly a fucking travesty.

There I was merrily going along in my day when I stopped by my local, Crack Dealer's Of Coffee, Tim Whoreton's walked up to the counter and ordered like I always have in the past.

"Extra Large Mocha, Please!"

The Girl smiled big and looked me square in the eyes and said, "I'm sorry we don't make those anymore."

I looked at the girl as if she just said she'd raped my cat up the ass with a curling iron. I was shocked. Especially shocked because I had ordered an Extra Large Mocha just a mere 6 or 7 hours previously at 3am.

I looked up at the menu sign, in hopes this was some kind of cruel prank, and where the price of an Extra Large Mocha should have been it was now blank.

Oh how sneaky these Crack Dealers of Coffee are. They'd laughed as they decided "Extra Large Mocha, No MORE!" [Insert Manical Laughter Here.] and removed the price from their menu signs.

The Bastards.

How DARE Tim Whoreton's deprive me of the correct dosage of crack they pass off as the "Extra Large Mocha". It's just not fair. I'd even just filled out a survey they'd put on and given them a glowing report. Oh what a difference a day makes. I'd have told them what a shitty service they offer in deleting my choices. It's not like they stopped making the Extra Large CUPS. The cups, which are still used for coffee, are there taunting me with the goodness of the Extra Large size.

So, here I sit, Sipping my Large Mocha. It's not quite the same.

I think I'll have to enter a 12 step program in order to properly lower my dosage to "Large" and to help with the emotional distress and damage that was brought on by the lack of notification those bastards at Tim Whoreton's gave me.

See, I told ya it was A Fucking Travesty.

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