2003-12-29 - 6:55 p.m.

Christmas 2003

I'm back.

Well, Technically I've been back for a few days. I had to come back to town on Boxing Day (In Canada, That's the Day after Christmas) to go back to work. Thankfully, I only had to work 3 days before my days off again.

I really wasn't completely ready to come back home. I am not quite sure what I would have done differently had the extra day to stay. I guess it's just my subconcious mind knowing that this was mostly likely the last Christmas I am going to have my mom around.

It's a lot like being passenger in a car without brakes. Watching it all pass by and without the ability to stop.

Just before I got to town she was put onto Oxygen. She's also using a wheelchair all the time. Amazingly, I find she's still showing good spirits. Of course, I was seeing her over Christmas and she was probably just trying to make it the best she could. She made a toast over Christmas dinner that almost brought her to tears. It wasn't a long and involved toast just short and to the point. That's the way my family is.

I did manage to get myself in my mom's bad books for a little bit. I guess I told my mom I was coming back to town on the 23rd. She thought I said I would come and see her before Christmas Day. I think this was a bit of a miscommunication. I know The Chick said she would come back without me before Christmas because she was going to be in town because I had to return home to do one more rotation before Christmas. The Chick ended up having a bad attack of her endometriosis which laid her up for the few days I was gone. When I got back I was so busy trying to get my holiday shopping done (because I didn't want to travel packing a bunch of stuff) that it took me right until Christmas Eve (I was in the stores until 4:30pm) to complete it. Anyway, I just apoligised for it and didn't bother telling my mom about what happened to The Chick.

Speaking of Christmas Shopping. I hit a complete blank when it came to my parents to this year. Living a distance away from your family does make trying to figure out what they want a lot more difficult. I ended up getting my mom some Chocolate's from Purdy's and some Scratch Tickets. Two things I'm pretty sure she enjoys. I ended up getting my Dad just a crap gift. Although I did get him one of the more expensive lottery tickets. Gambling type items are always a good bet with my family. The Chick got a really good kick out of the fact we put a scratch and win ticket on each plate at the Christmas Dinner table. Actually, there were three each this year (I won $4).

The Kid had a good time. My sister Jo has three boys. We showed up quite early at my sister's place and so he got a good long time to play with them. Her youngest is the same age as The Kid.

Evening ended too early for Jo. She thought my Mom wasn't ready to go. Although, I was sitting talking to my other sister's boyfriend and we noticed it was really quiet and everyone was sitting passed out. So, I think whether it was time to go or not can be debated to enternity. The fact of the matter is it was going to be too early even if it had lasted all night. You just can't get around that. I was part of the brigade that helped my mom out to the car.

My dad stood in the kitchen and let the brigade of people head outside. I looked at him and said "Staying out the way?" and he just nodded and kind of gave me that exasperated look. I'm sure he feels pretty helpless at times which I know is frustrating for him. I think he feels pushed out of the way at times. I know all he wants to do is help. That's what he's done his entire life with my mom. He's been the fixer, the doer, it's all he knows. To not be able to do so or be allowed to at times must drive him nuts.

We got my mom in the car. I leaned into the car and did something I don't do often enough. I gave my mom a kiss. She started to cry and told me to close the car door. I waved goodbye to my other sister and her boyfriend who were driving my parents home. I walked back inside and found my sister Jo discussing her feelings about the early evening with The Chick.

The Chick's been amazing through all this. Which makes me feel so lucky considering I know how useless I felt and must have seemed back in the days when I was with Lisa and her Mom was dying of cancer. It makes me very thankful for The Chick and makes the times when she's driving me nuts not seem so important to me anymore.

We stayed with The Chick's parents. I think I'll leave that end of things for another time. Hope you all had a Merry Christmas (for those that celebrate it).

|

previous - next

The Last Five Bingo Games

Ripples - 2011-02-01
Checkmate - 2010-11-11
I Need Anger - 2010-10-15
I'd Like To Point Something Out - 2010-09-10
A Tempting Morsal - 2010-08-20

What rating is your journal?